Taking Weekend Tennis Seriously

With USTA play-offs starting this weekend, I thought we would talk about the silly people who don’t communicate well, who don’t take weekend tennis seriously, and who drive their captains and teammates nuts as a result.  I don’t see how the former spun off into the latter anymore than you do, but that’s my intro!

I do not understand the players who sign up for team tennis without thinking it all the way through.  It’s as if joining is the cool thing to do and no one wants to be the loser that says, “No, I don’t play USTA.”  Yeah, there’s nothing cooler than throwing away $50+ on something you’re barely involved with or have no real interest in.

These people think they want to play team tennis, but they don’t.  They want to feel good about themselves.  They want the superficial feel of being a part of a group.  They sign up for a team and think, “Ah, I helped this poor captain out by signing up for her team and adding to her roster.  A job well done.  Now I can go on vacation and miss half the season!”

For them, signing up for a tennis team is like signing up for a gym membership but without the guilt.  It’s the same concept – they sign up because it means they’ll be forced to work out.  “I signed up for this expensive gym membership!  I’m locked in for 3 months!  I’ll have to work out now!”  They think that by signing up for a tennis team, they’re ensuring themselves of physical activity for the next few months (the actual matches, the drills, the practice matches, etc.).  But instead of those people carrying the responsibilities of having to make themselves available to play tennis as they would to work out at a gym, it’s their captains who have to deal with all that hassle of hunting them down and arranging the match day roster based off of their schedules (I assume captains generally want all their players to play so they’ll go out of their ways to put people in the lineups).  Instead of having to be both their super-egos and their ids, these people only have to play the part of big babies.  They play team tennis if their lives can fit it in.  And because they don’t have to make themselves do anything, they feel no guilt when they allow life to get in the way and they can’t play.

Here’s my problem with people who don’t communicate well and/or who spend half the season doing non-tennis activities.  First of all, not communicating well is just annoying, and I feel bad for the captains who put up with it.  I don’t understand how these people function in society.  But that’s not my main beef.  My problem is that by being on a team, they’re giving their teams hope.  The team at full strength with all of its players available is a force to be reckoned with.  That was the thought when the team was originally constructed.  The team at full strength could make the playoffs and do some damage (ah, perhaps that’s where I was going in my intro).  But because they and friends aren’t available or can’t commit in a timely manner, our team has already lost.  The team is forced to throw out a weak lineup and players play with strangers at lines they have no business even sniffing.  And we lose.  And it’s not fun.

With players unavailable, doesn’t that mean more playing time for me?  What do I care as long as I get to play?  I care about being a part of a competitive team.  But we are not a competitive team if there aren’t enough players available.  The rest of us are just sacrificial lambs running around in adverse weather conditions while our “teammates” stay comfy.

And on that note, congratulations and good luck to everyone who made playoffs!  Let the fighting between teammates, captains, and opponents begin…bwahaha!